Steal My Strategy to Combat Second-Language Shyness

Whether you’re the type of person who is filled with ambition, or are a humble goal-setter, we can all get trapped in the thinking that we aren’t really living our best life if we don’t achieve results using our Plan A and Plan A only. Like, if we didn’t strictly stick to that one plan, yet achieve a goal anyway, that accomplishment is somehow devalued in our minds. What one can fail to realise in entertaining that way of thinking is that if, in order to get to your goal, you had to employ Plan B, or C, or even part of Plan Z along the way, you still made it. You got there with a combination of Plan A and its deviations. It’s not worth less because you didn’t guess ahead of time that the original Plan A would require some adjustments. It’s almost like we can get attached to feeling down on ourselves for things that we actually could afford to just let go of. 

As someone who, as a child, was a student who wanted to be a teacher, and then, as an adult, became a teacher of my own native language, it could be easy to get down on myself thinking about my own experience as a second language learner who started at age 15. When I started out as a student of Mandarin, I had the luxury of taking high school and university classes, which I loved attending and doing the work for. Since then, though, there have been inspiring peaks and deep, deep valleys in my regular Mandarin studies over the years; my independent language study has been very hodge-podge. As an adult I haven’t had the luxury of available time in the same way I once did - which leads to, *gulp*, attrition. Attrition is pretty much the opposite of acquisition: It means “the action or process of gradually reducing the strength or effectiveness of someone or something through sustained attack or pressure...”. In the case of language learning, losing previous gains doesn’t usually come about through some “attack” but certainly the pressures of “adulting” have an effect because they take their toll on your free time and other resources. 

What is “second-language shyness”?

And what happens when you experience language attrition? You clam up during rare chances to practice with native speakers. What I would call “second-language shyness” creates a vicious cycle. Especially, I find, if in your native language you are normally an extroverted person, then being struck silent by second-language shyness can feel very constricting: It impacts not just your ability to participate in conversations and other events to the full extent of your liking but also the natural expression of your personality. In turn it can make you feel fake and self-conscious when you are trying to be so genuine in expressing yourself through your passion for language learning. It’s a mess. How can learning thrive in that kind of mental spiral? And how then, as a language learner, do you return learning to a positive in your life rather than something to be avoided or to hound oneself over for “failing”?

How can you combat second-language shyness?

First, it’s important to embrace the attitude that unless you are studying something for a life-and-death job, it’s not going to matter all that much to others how quickly or slowly you make gains. Particularly when you are an adult and, presumably, past an age where your elders may pressure you to get top marks in your pursuit, it’s really nobody’s business how well you are doing and the only person you really have to answer to is yourself. Setting smaller, attainable goals rather than the nebulous and somewhat elusive goal of “being fluent” - treating your learning as something you do for pleasure, for brain health, and generalised self-improvement - begins to take some pressure off. 

Once you feel like you have realistic expectations of yourself, you can gravitate to study methods that will keep you motivated, rather than ones that just remind you of how much you still don’t know. One way to do this is to “go back to being a baby”, which means, allow yourself to relax into just absorbing inputs and not worry as much about output for a while. In other words, focusing for some time on immersing yourself in receptive-skill activities such as listening and reading, putting less emphasis on productive skills such as writing and speaking. This is not to say that productive skills aren’t important - of course they are! But we are talking about studying for pleasure and fending off negative self-talk, not studying to achieve a high mark on an exam (unless you like exams! Hey! Some people do…).

I, for one, cannot wait to tackle a new show that was just recommended by one of my favourite online teachers ShuoshuoChinese说说中文  in her video “Two Powerful Methods: Make Real Change Before 2024”. Watching TV shows in one’s second language is not only a smart way to study, but also is actually an essential tool for people who cannot live in the country where their target language originates. In fact, I have a few Chinese shows in My List on Netflix that I will be reviewing and recommending on our Sandy Suggests page (as soon as I find the time amongst all that “adulting” I have to do!). But the show she recommends is genius: It’s a dating show, which means I’ll get to hear native Mandarin speakers engaging in authentic small talk and repeating questions and so on. And it’s highly likely to be funny, which always helps!

How can we help you?

Two of the major tenets of our mission at Little Crab Educational Press are to demystify Mandarin for native English speakers, and to make it easier for native Mandarin speaking expats to maintain their mother tongue for their child(ren). That is why I always knew that my children’s books would have audio narrations included; we want to make it pleasant and easy for both native and non-native speakers of Mandarin or English to engage with our stories, and be able to immerse their babies and little kids (or just themselves!) in the sounds of whichever of the two languages they are learning. As part of that, I created an audio track called the “10 Special Sounds in Mandarin”, which explains the pronunciation of said sounds, and a second track called “Mandarin Chinese Pronunciation - In A Nutshell” that breaks down many similarities, as well as differences, between Mandarin and English so that readers of our children’s books can start from a place of some understanding before launching straight into the story narrations. 

Those 2 audio tracks have been in my toolbox for many years as I developed the flagship storybook of LCEP, Little Byron - Xiǎo Bái Rèn - 小白任. To further our mission, we are excited to announce the launch of our Little Audio Library, which houses all the free audio that accompanies our stories and other products, as well as those two “starting place” tracks mentioned above. The Little Audio Library is presented in the form of a podcast and as videos complete with captioning to make this resource as accessible and inclusive as possible to serve your language learning needs. The podcast format makes it easy to update, and easy for listeners to know exactly which track they need at a given time because of the individual “episode” descriptions and cover art, so we have made updating it our priority, but the video library will continue to expand as well. If you have joined our mailing list, then you will get notified as the Little Audio Library is updated.

If you’re not working on learning Mandarin or English, the concept of what I’m addressing here still stands: Along with tv shows as mentioned above, audiobooks and podcasts are a powerful way to employ that “be like a baby” strategy, providing yourself an additional means of soaking up your target language.

Even though my path to learning Chinese has been hodge-podge, as I mentioned, I am never giving up. Language learning is a lifelong pursuit, so it’s OK that that fantasy “Plan A” (a direct line to full fluency, no breaks, no stops) isn’t realistic. It’s OK if I “get there” by using Plan B, parts of plan E, a few pieces of plans J and M, and lots of Plan Z after all. It’s my language journey, and I intend to enjoy it! And I hope you enjoy our reading materials and their accompanying free audio as much as we do. 

We love hearing about your strategies and what tools you utilize to keep yourself motivated and keep the learning rolling. Tag us on social media @littlecrabpress with those or always feel free to bring us a concept for a tool you wish existed but can’t find and maybe we can make it a reality for you!

Enjoy your journey,

Rebecca